Ölümün otobüs durağinda evini bulmak: Bir internet topluluğunda çetin bedenler ve mütelevvin deneyim

In this work, I look at posts from alt.suicide.holiday (ASH), a defunct unmoderated internet community frequented by suicidal people, to analyze narratives that they share in an environment not subject to "expert" oversight. I claim that breaking the silence around suicide described by Baril (2018) and Webb (2011) allows ASHers to constitute a tenuous experience within the narrative space of the group that is denied to them elsewhere. Using ASH as a surface of visibility, I look at wider social, discursive and material structures shaping ASHers' degraded living such as narrative processes of redirection, obfuscation and erasure (that contribute to the further degradation of their experience), a peculiar form of secondary subjection constituting suicidals as fragile subjects, and an organization of the field of practice around suicide that qualifies it as a form of consumption in Certeau's (1984) terms with important consequences for how ASHers experience their bodies.